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Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.

20 Years Of Harry Potter

J.K. Rowling published ‘Harry Potter And The Philosopher’s Stone’ on June 26th, 1997, and it instantly became a cultural touchstone. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the 20-year history of the Harry Potter franchise.

Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.
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Occupy Wall Street Growing

Last week, Occupy Wall Street, the movement attempting to shine a light on corporate excess and greed, was joined by United Airlines pilots, Metropolitan Transit Authority workers, and Michael Moore. What do you think?

  • "Finally, something to do in the Financial District after 6 p.m."

    Paul Bowles Systems Analyst
  • "I assume you're stopping me because you saw my great protest sign and now you want to ask me how I got the glitter to stay on the poster board without falling off. I'll never tell you my secrets."

    Lauren James Nodulizer
  • "I don’t think the protests will accomplish much unless they have signs. Wait, do they have signs?!"

    David Green Hardener

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