Oldest Human Poop Discovered In Spain

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WASHINGTON—Saying they simply needed something to direct their anger toward, the nation’s frenzied Donald Trump supporters admitted Thursday that, if circumstances were different, they would be just as happy tearing the Republican frontrunner to pieces.
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Oldest Human Poop Discovered In Spain

Archaeologists working at an ancient campsite in Alicante, Spain discovered a pile of poop left by Neanderthals 50,000 years ago, which revealed that they were not strict carnivores as previously believed, but also ate plant matter. What do you think?

  • “This is what passes as news? A revelatory glimpse at the diet of our earliest ancestors?”

    Chris Straley
    Form Processor
  • “Fecal matter at campsites? Thank God we evolved out of doing that.”

    Barry Conover
    Stationary Designer
  • “Are they going to put the poop in a museum so freaks like me can come see it or not?”

    Marie Westin
    Registrar