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Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

‘FanSided’ Ranks All 128 NFL Teams

NEW YORK—As part of its comprehensive professional football coverage in anticipation of the upcoming season, sports news site ‘FanSided’ published an article Tuesday ranking all 128 NFL teams.
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On Albert Pujols And Joey Votto Battling For The Triple Crown

  • "When will this bitter cold war between Dominicans and Canadians ever end?"

  • "Steroids. Steroids that let you crank the ball out of the park, drop in a clutch base hit, and leg out a bunt single all at the same time."

  • "No kidding? Somebody should probably tell the president of baseball or something, because I'd think they'd want to celebrate this."

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