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How The IOC Plans To Address Doping

In light of its recent decision not to bar Russian athletes from competing in Rio despite their use of performance-enhancing drugs, the International Olympic Committee is working to establish more effective protocols to keep the Games drug-free. Here are some ways the IOC plans to address doping:
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On High-Profile Games Between Small-Market Cities:

  • "Red Sox-Dodgers? Too easy. With Rays-Phillies, you have no idea what you're going to find interesting!"

  • "I always like it when small markets compete, like when the 96-and-up demographic took on the black Jews."

  • "I always thought Cody, WY was a big city. Shucks."

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