On The NBA All-Star Game:

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How The IOC Plans To Address Doping

In light of its recent decision not to bar Russian athletes from competing in Rio despite their use of performance-enhancing drugs, the International Olympic Committee is working to establish more effective protocols to keep the Games drug-free. Here are some ways the IOC plans to address doping:
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On The NBA All-Star Game:

  • "I can't believe the NBA All-Star Game, with all that talent, felt the need to take steroids and ruin baseball forever."

  • "If I heard the news correctly, a lot of people are going to be pretty angry when A-Staud shows up."

  • "The NBA All-Star game—oh yeah, that reminds me of A-Rod and how I want to die."

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