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Palin Abdicates Gubernatorial Seat

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Trump Casually Informs Pence He Going To Make One Or Two Appearances During Speech

CLEVELAND—Pulling his running mate aside backstage at the Republican National Convention just minutes before the Indiana governor was scheduled to formally accept the party’s vice presidential nomination, GOP candidate Donald Trump casually informed Mike Pence that he would probably make one or two quick appearances during the Midwestern conservative’s headlining speech tonight.

‘Heed My Tragic Story Well, Friends, For You Could Just As Easily Be Me,’ Says Chris Christie In Haunting RNC Speech

CLEVELAND—A thrall sweeping over the assembled GOP officials and party members Tuesday as he recounted his chilling tale of hubris, New Jersey governor Chris Christie reportedly entreated those at the Republican National Convention to consider the sad story of his own dizzying rise and ignominious fall, offering a bitter warning to all in attendance that his terrible fate could befall any one of them.
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Palin Abdicates Gubernatorial Seat

Alaska governor Sarah Palin turned over executive control of the state to Sean Parnell, saying that if she served a lame duck year in the office, it would not benefit anyone. What do you think?
  • “Beautiful, a liar, and a quitter. God, I haven’t been this aroused by the thought of a woman in two years.”

    Charles Mann Bias-Binding Cutter
  • “Nothing can distract her laser focus from the ultimate prize: the Fields Medal.”

    Dawn Pitkin Garment Inspector
  • "With this Sean Parnell guy coming in, at least they won't have to change the initials carved into the caribou-antler throne that has served as the ceremonial seat of Alaskan governors since 1959."

    Pat Wasserstrom Honey Extractor

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