Pawlenty Drops Out

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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  • Father Apologizes For Taking Out Anger On Wrong Son

    ELIZABETH, NJ—Moments after losing his composure with an unwarranted emotional outburst, local father David Kessler reportedly apologized to his son Christopher Thursday for erroneously taking out his anger on him and not his older brother Peter.

Election 2016

Pawlenty Drops Out

Following a poor showing in the Iowa straw poll, former Minnesota governor Tim Pawlenty announced Sunday he was no longer seeking to become the Republican nominee for president. What do you think?

  • “I don’t see how this is going to help his campaign at all.”

    Damon Chater
    Hand Embroiderer
  • "When Ron Paul beats you with hand-painted plywood signs left over from 2007, it's definitely time to pack it up."

    Julie Steltmann
    Trust-Vault Clerk
  • "If he can't handle the results of some silly straw poll, how would he have handled bombing Iran? I need someone who can handle a straw poll and bomb Iran."

    Jay Diblasi
    Goods Layer