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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.
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Pediatricians Tout Benefits Of Circumcision

After a major review of medical research, the American Academy of Pediatrics announced that the benefits of circumcising newborn males outweighed the risks, citing in particular circumcised men’s lower risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases. What do you think?

  • “Look, I can’t keep getting my foreskin sewn back on and then taken off again every time a new study comes out.”

    Jose Angel Rosales University Dean
  • “Whatever this new-fangled thing is, if my son wants it, he can save up his allowance and pay for it himself.”

    Wendy Batzdorff Merchandise Distributor
  • “Of course the doctors recommend it. They’re the ones who get to keep all the foreskins.”

    James Landi Armature Tester

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