adBlockCheck

Pentagon Proposes Scaling Back Army To Pre-WWII Levels

Top Headlines

Recent News

Charles Koch Orders Sniper To Fire Warning Shot Next To Marco Rubio On Debate Stage

GREENVILLE, SC—In response to the presidential candidate’s unsatisfactory answer to a question about the economic effects of environmental regulations, Koch Industries CEO Charles Koch reportedly ordered a sniper positioned in the rafters of the Greenville Peace Center to fire a warning shot near Marco Rubio’s podium during Saturday’s Republican debate.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next
TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

Special Coverage

Holidays

Pentagon Proposes Scaling Back Army To Pre-WWII Levels

Defense Secretary Chuck Hagel proposed a new Pentagon budget that would shrink the U.S. Army to its smallest size in 74 years and retire an entire fleet of A-10 “Warthog” jets, cuts he said would allow for a more versatile, technologically advanced force. What do you think?

  • “Yeah, we did things just right in the run-up to World War II.”

    Jackson Cummings
    Software Installer
  • “Our enemies who wanted America to have a more versatile, technologically advanced fighting force have won!”

    Brenda Sockaloe
    Furniture Arranger
  • “I give it 10 months before Hagel comes crawling back to the Flying Warthogs.”

    Harry McKee
    Sound Mixer

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close