Phone Hack Whistleblower Found Dead

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Vol 47 Issue 29

Nation's School Systems Held Back A Year

WASHINGTON—Having continued to display learning deficits and a failure to reach basic educational milestones, the nation's school systems will be asked to repeat the academic year, sources confirmed Friday.
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  • Night Out Consecrated With Opening Exchange Of High-Fives

    CHARLOTTE, NC—Kicking off the evening with their customary expression of excitement and camaraderie, a group of friends reportedly consecrated their night out on the town Friday with a ceremonial opening exchange of high-fives.

Holiday

Phone Hack Whistleblower Found Dead

Sean Hoare, a former News Of The World entertainment journalist who was first to admit publicly that reporters were encouraged to hack celebrities' phones, was found dead in his home at Watford, England. What do you think?

  • "Well, I hope we've all learned a valuable lesson about trying to rid the world of evil."

    Lynn Scott
    Vault Custodian
  • "That guy was kind of Woodward and Bernstein, Deep Throat and Nixon all in one."

    Ian Evans
    Systems Analyst
  • "I hope you're not implying that this guy was killed by Rupert Murdoch, because that's the kind of thing that can get you killed by Rupert Murdoch."

    Josh Wright
    Unemployed
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