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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Phones May Help Diagnose STDs

British researchers are developing a computer chip that uses a smartphone and a saliva or urine sample to determine what, if any, sexually transmitted disease the user has. What do you think?

  • "That should free up my gynecologist to help me figure out how to make an international call."

    Gina Neville Systems Analyst
  • "Great, another piece of technology I'm going to have to spend all afternoon teaching my parents to use."

    Jason Porter Order Filler
  • "How can a program tell the difference between a disease and if you just spilled some hot sauce down there earlier, for fun?"

    Philip Modeliste Electronic Scale Tester
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