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Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.

20 Years Of Harry Potter

J.K. Rowling published ‘Harry Potter And The Philosopher’s Stone’ on June 26th, 1997, and it instantly became a cultural touchstone. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the 20-year history of the Harry Potter franchise.

Pros And Cons Of The Gig Economy

Americans are increasingly using on-demand services, both as workers and consumers. Here are the major benefits and drawbacks of the gig economy.
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Pittsburgh No. 1 In Soot

The American Lung Association named Pittsburgh as the sootiest city in America. What do you think?
  • "I'm still angry that my hometown, Philadelphia, was named No. 1 in sticky surfaces."

    Steve Brown Hair Stylist
  • "It's not surprising. Pittsburgh is where Mister Rogers' Neighborhood was taped, and that show alone pumped out over one million metric tons of carbon dioxide a year."

    Victoria Belew Typist
  • "Well, it's better than being the snootiest. How d'ya like that, Greenwich, Connecticut?"

    Alex Downie Antiques Restorer

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