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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Plot To Murder Justin Bieber Foiled

Two men have been accused of planning to capture teen pop sensation Justin Bieber at a recent concert, strangle him to death with a paisley tie, and possibly castrate him, a plot allegedly masterminded by a 45-year-old jailed New Mexico rapist and murderer with a tattoo of Bieber on his leg. What do you think?

  • “Hey, that was my idea!”

    Daisuke Koyama Unemployed
  • “Yeah, I felt the same way after Bieber changed his hairstyle, but you know what? I think I’ve grown to like the new hairstyle even more than the original.”

    Kay Rifkin Game-Bird Farmer
  • “How’d they get tickets?!”

    Tobias Hightower Radar Mechanic
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