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Biden Opts Out Of Putting Last Few Felonies On Job Application

WASHINGTON—Saying he would be “sitting pretty” if he landed such a primo gig, Vice President Joe Biden reportedly decided Tuesday to leave off several of his most recent felonies while filling out a job application for a blackjack dealer position at the Horseshoe Casino Baltimore.
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Pope Signals Acceptance Of Gay Priests

Pope Francis said today that he would not judge gay priests so long as they are faithful and have good will, claiming that it is Catholic teaching to treat homosexuals with dignity. What do you think?

  • “Ah shit, another group of people I have to treat with dignity.”

    Fausto Moreno Gasket Attacher
  • “This is not the same Catholic Church I grew up with. This one is slightly different.”

    Paul Eyck Night Court Magistrate
  • “But I can still judge, right?”

    Yvonne Goode Systems Analyst

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