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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Pot Smokers Well-Adjusted

A recent Swiss survey reveals that that teenagers who smoke marijuana function better than those who also use tobacco. What do you think?
  • "I think it's because pot smoking teaches kids to slow down and take stock of what's really important in life: sandwiches."

    Terry Gerdes Lathe Operator
  • "What about those teenagers who aren't musicians, painters, and deadbeats? How well do they function?"

    Alice Muldowney Customs Official
  • "Is this some kind of trick to make kids think that pot isn't cool?"

    Ivan Chernikoff Metal Furniture Restorer
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