Prince William Engaged

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Vol 46 Issue 46

Coach Has Difficulty Describing What Sort Of Win That Was

ORLANDO, FL—Following his team's 89-72 victory over the Memphis Grizzlies Monday, Orlando Magic head coach Stan Van Gundy struggled to characterize the victory at a postgame press conference, saying that the win was not emotional, dominating, close,...

Should Boys Get HPV Vaccine?

Medical professionals are currently deciding whether using the HPV vaccine to decrease the risk of certain cancers in boys is worth the cost of the immunization treatment.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Technology

Technology Unfortunately Allows Distant Friends To Reconnect

WAYNE, PA—Providing them the tools necessary to bridge a gap that both individuals say they were more than willing to maintain indefinitely, sources confirmed Monday that the advent of modern technology has unfortunately allowed distant friends Mere...

Fun

  • Night Out Consecrated With Opening Exchange Of High-Fives

    CHARLOTTE, NC—Kicking off the evening with their customary expression of excitement and camaraderie, a group of friends reportedly consecrated their night out on the town Friday with a ceremonial opening exchange of high-fives.

Prince William Engaged

The engagement of Prince William to his longtime girlfriend Kate Middleton was announced Tuesday. What do you think?

  • "Young man dressed like Thurston Howell III, check. Young woman with a slightly horsey build, check. Obscenely expensive ring from the monarchy's private collection, check. Yep, looks like a British royal engagement to me."

    Tom Carthy
    Medical Social Worker
  • "People are probably jumping all over her about being after the family's money, but she's been with him for eight years. I don't see why she shouldn't be promoted."

    Perry Ireland
    Electric Assembler
  • "She knows that being decapitated for not producing a male heir is part of the deal, right?"

    Marianne Rizzo
    Senior Solution Architect
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