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Man Holding Hands With Pregnant Woman Must Have Weird Fetish

RED BANK, NJ—Testing the limits of what even the most progressive onlookers considered publicly acceptable, a man was seen by multiple witnesses Tuesday holding hands with a visibly pregnant woman in what many could only interpret as the expression of a bizarre fetish.
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Professional Porn Sales Down

Sales and rentals of adult DVDs are down 30 percent due to the rise in homemade Internet porn. What do you think?
  • "These thrifty Internet porn enthusiasts are missing out on the lifelong friends you make at adult shops."

    Robin Petersen Database Adminsitrator
  • "That's the problem with the porn biz. No matter how low your price is for having an entire billiard-ball set shoved up your ass, there's always some punk waiting in the wings willing to do it for free."

    Simon Stephens Florist
  • "Yeah, that's my fault. Sorry."

    Elizabeth Whaley Labor Mediator

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