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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Python Hunting Contest Opens In Everglades

In an effort to control the Everglades’ population of invasive Burmese Pythons, which can grow to 20 feet long, Florida officials opened a month-long hunting contest in which professional and amateur snake hunters will compete for cash prizes based on the number of snakes they kill. What do you think?

  • “I hope they don’t kill any of the cute little 10-foot pythons.”

    Georgina Stader Dietitian
  • “What a thrill for amateur snake hunters to be standing shoulder-to-shoulder with the pros of snake hunting!”

    Gil Sabine Rod Bending Machine Operator
  • “I predict this will end badly for someone. Most likely someone who puts a lot of time and effort into this contest and comes up short by a few snakes.”

    Herman Gould Tombstone Setter
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