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Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
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Rats’ Brains Connected Via Internet

Creating the first ever brain-to-brain interface, scientists have connected the brains of lab rats via Internet cables, allowing the animals to communicate motor information to one another even when they’re thousands of miles apart. What do you think?

  • “Wow! That sounds incredibly inhumane and amazing.”

    Bernie Alonzo Cemetery Worker
  • “Boy, this should really improve the rat experience.”

    Linda Christian Fish Cleaner
  • “Don’t those rats have anything better to do than surf the web all day?”

    Joel Beesley Shingle Trimmer
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