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Reactors Contaminate Groundwater

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Charles Koch Orders Sniper To Fire Warning Shot Next To Marco Rubio On Debate Stage

GREENVILLE, SC—In response to the presidential candidate’s unsatisfactory answer to a question about the economic effects of environmental regulations, Koch Industries CEO Charles Koch reportedly ordered a sniper positioned in the rafters of the Greenville Peace Center to fire a warning shot near Marco Rubio’s podium during Saturday’s Republican debate.
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Reactors Contaminate Groundwater

Two nuclear reactors, Indian Point near New York and the Braidwood facility near Chicago, have released radioactive tritium into the groundwater. What do you think?
  • "Aren't scientists excited to discover new species? Well, here's their chance!"

    Holly Page
    Systems Analyst
  • "I think we're all thinking the same thing: How will the nuclear power companies cope with this setback?"

    Scott Duddy
    Short-Order Cook
  • "It's a lot of nothing. A leak was found at a facility in my area last year and my conjoined quadruplets turned out just fine."

    Nate McConarty
    Corrections Officer

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