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‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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Record Sales Expected For Cyber Monday

Cyber Monday, the first Monday after the Thanksgiving holiday, is expected to bring in record online sales this year. What do you think?

  • "It better be worth it. I’ve been camped out in front of my laptop for a week."

    Glen Cook Systems Analyst
  • "If you do your holiday shopping from the comfort of your home, you can hit your kid without any sass from other customers."

    Angela Layton Hoist Operator
  • "It's great that holiday shoppers are finally discovering the same ease and convenience of online purchasing we anal-bead aficionados have enjoyed for years."

    Josh Noel Chief Gauger

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