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Brita Unveils New In-Throat Water Filters

OAKLAND, CA—Representatives from Brita, the nation’s bestselling brand of household water filtration products, held a press event Wednesday to unveil a new line of filters designed to be installed directly inside users’ throats.

Video Game Henchmen Plan Meetup Around Explosive Barrels

LEVEL 5—A group of video game henchmen patrolling the warehouse hideout of their criminal mastermind boss informed reporters Wednesday of their upcoming plan to take a brief break from making their rounds to meet up around a stack of five highly explosive barrels.

Study Links Clinical Depression To Getting Dunked On

BOSTON—Identifying a significant factor contributing to the development of the mental health disorder, researchers from Harvard Medical School published a groundbreaking study Thursday that reportedly links clinical depression to getting dunked on.

How Dating Sites Match Their Users

With millions of people opting to use online dating sites to meet new potential romantic partners, many are wondering how computer algorithms can enhance their chances of finding “the one.” Here are the steps that dating sites take to match compatible users

How To File A Patent

In the United States, anyone who believes they have invented something truly unique is welcome to fill out a patent application to protect it, but it’s often a complicated and laborious process. Here are the steps involved in securing a patent

EPA Urges Nation To Develop New Air Source

WASHINGTON—Citing the hazardous levels of carbon dioxide and other pollutants accumulating in the atmosphere, officials from the Environmental Protection Agency urged the nation this week to develop a new air source.
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Recreational Viagra Use

According to a recent study, recreational use of Viagra is on the rise among younger men who don't suffer from impotence. What do you think?
  • "Is having sex for 48 hours straight some kind of a game to these people?"

    Rudy Garcia Housekeeper
  • "At last, a medical miracle to eliminate the 3 percent of the time 20-year-olds don't have erections."

    Douglas Hirtz Counselor
  • "The young people should just stick to the marijuana and the goofballs and let their elders have their Viagra."

    Lawrence Hardin Systems Analyst
  • "This is what happens when the increasingly conservative young people go emulating Bob Dole."

    Rhonda Hansen Photographer
  • "Wow, there's an illicit market for these pills? And all this time, I've foolishly been using them to try to satisfy my wife."

    William Knotz Rental Clerk
  • "If kids today just pop a pill every time they want an erection, how are they going to learn valuable pussy-eating skills?"

    Jane Setzer Set Designer

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