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Politics

Robert Mueller Driving SUV 100 MPH Down Runway As Air Force One Narrowly Lifts Off

PRINCE GEORGE’S COUNTY, MD—Sending a pair of guards scrambling for safety as he gunned his black SUV through a chain-link gate and onto the tarmac, Robert Mueller, the former FBI director who was recently tapped to lead the ongoing investigation into the Trump campaign’s ties to Russia, chased Air Force One down the runway at Joint Base Andrews moments before takeoff, sources reported Tuesday.

Trump Asks Entire Senate To Clear Out Of Chamber So He Can Speak To Comey Alone

WASHINGTON—Entering through a side door and bidding the assembled legislators, congressional aides, and members of the media to give him a moment with the former FBI director, President Donald Trump reportedly asked the entire Senate to clear the chamber during James Comey’s testimony Thursday so he could speak to him alone.

A Timeline Of The Watergate Scandal

With the White House mired in controversy, comparisons to Washington’s most famous scandal have been common, if not always accurate. Forty-five years after the events leading to Nixon’s resignation, The Onion presents a detailed timeline of the Watergate scandal.
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Rep. Jefferson Under Investigation

The House has ordered a speedy ethics probe into the dealings of Rep. William J. Jefferson (D-LA) that could oust him before he goes to trial on charges of federal corruption. What do you think?
  • "Can he still keep the money?"

    Patty Blonsky Systems Analyst
  • "But they can't expel him now—according to his expense account, he's still airlifting survivors out of New Orleans."

    Brian Skurnick Punch Press Operator
  • "This is good. I was beginning to fear that the new Congress was setting an impossible standard of personal conduct as of late. I'm going to the store and stealing some grapes now."

    Bruce Sporn Chiropodist

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