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Report: 'SkyMall' Magazine May End Print Edition

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360 Tour: Inside The RNC

The Onion invites you to explore our view from the floor of the 2016 Republican National Convention in Cleveland.

Good Guy With Gun, Bad Guy With Gun Both Excited To Unload Firearm In Crowd Outside Arena

CLEVELAND—As each of them looked around at the people gathered outside Quicken Loans Arena and fantasized about unholstering their weapon and taking aim directly at others, both a good guy with a gun and a bad guy with a gun attending the Republican National Convention reportedly worked themselves into a heightened state of excitement Thursday at the thought of unloading their firearm into the crowd.

Bob Dole Picked Off By Large Hawk Circling Arena Parking Lot

CLEVELAND—Describing how the bird of prey suddenly dived down from the sky at high velocity, sources confirmed Thursday that former GOP presidential nominee Bob Dole was picked off by a large red-tailed hawk circling above the Quicken Loans Arena parking lot.
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Report: 'SkyMall' Magazine May End Print Edition

Reports have surfaced that after losing $3.2 million last year, SkyMall magazine, the in-flight airline catalogue that sells electronics, home decor and novelty items, may stop printing catalogues and go web-only. What do you think?

  • "Call me old-fashioned, but I still like to shop in person at a local store for all my obscene crap."

    Deborah Claspell Community Theater Consultant
  • "Alright, how many ‘Summer Savannah’ Backyard Garden Lion Pedestals do I have to order to turn this thing around?"

    Ross Hammersmith Parking Garage Attendant
  • “That’s okay. I still have dozens of back issues I haven’t gotten through.”

    Jordan Boggs Loitering Ban Enforcer

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