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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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Robert Altman Dead

Acclaimed director Robert Altman died this week. What do you think?
  • "I hope he didn't check 'Yes' on the organ-donation box. There's nothing worse than a third-hand heart."

    Rebecca Johansen Systems Analyst
  • "This death came out of nowhere. Mr. Altman appeared so young, vibrant, and fresh-faced."

    Lee Utrecht Tunnel Digger
  • "See what happens when you go around being stoned all the time? You accidentally make Popeye and manage to fuck up what would have been a perfectly lovely obit."

    Jeremy Wilmington Bricklayer

More from this section

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

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