adBlockCheck

Entertainment

‘The Princess Bride’ By The Numbers

‘The Princess Bride’ was released 30 years ago today, and it has since become a classic beloved by people of all ages. ‘The Onion’ looks back at ‘The Princess Bride’ 30 years later.

Red Roof Inn Announces New Suicidal Suite

In an effort to cater to customers who have lost the will to live, economy hotel chain Red Roof Inn officially unveiled Thursday its new Suicidal Suite available at each of their locations across the nation.

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

Infographic: 20 Years Of Netflix

Netflix was founded as an online DVD rental service in 1997 and has since evolved into a subscription-based streaming platform with its own slate of original programming. The Onion looks back at the most important moments in the company’s 20-year history.

Musical The Kind With Number About Putting On A Show

TALLAHASSEE, FL—Noting the increasingly animated choreography and behavior of the characters on stage, sources at the Tallahassee Community Theatre reported Friday that this is apparently the kind of musical with a big number about putting on a show.
End Of Section
  • More News

Rock Concert Ratings

Rock group Marilyn Manson's current tour—which includes explicit depictions of violent and sexual acts—has met with protests from decency groups, sparking a call for ratings for rock concerts. What do you think?
  • "I agree that something should be done. I've felt this way since 1978, when I saw Shaun Cassidy eat a baby onstage."

    Irene Merrick Bank Teller
  • "This is a difficult issue: I'm torn between a deep hatred of censorship and an even deeper one for Marilyn Manson."

    Russell Bossy Student
  • "I'm sure teenagers wouldn't be flocking to these Marilyn Manson shows if they were clearly labeled as carnal circuses of nudity, gore and corpse-fucking."

    Dave Tonelli Paint Salesman
  • "I think those rock concerts are dangerous. I was at a BoDeans show once, and a number of concertgoers stood around holding lit cigarette lighters in their hands. It could have started a fire."

    Melissa Goring Systems Analyst
  • "Whatever happened to good old-fashioned songs like 'Would You Share A Strawberry Bromide With Me, My Sweet Pollybelle'? Everything today is about the sexy kissing and the holding of the hands."

    Ed Resch Science Teacher
  • "The only thing warning labels do is serve to make things even more attractive. Why do you think I drink anti-freeze?"

    Tim Langevin Legal Secretary

More from this section

Stunned Adam Schefter Receives Ominous Tip From Future Self

BRISTOL, CT—Slowly returning to his desk shaken and confused, sources reported Wednesday that ESPN NFL Insider Adam Schefter was stunned to receive an ominous tip from his future self while walking through one of his office building’s hallways.

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close