Samsung Unveils Smartwatch

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Frenzied Trump Supporters Admit They’d Be Just As Happy Tearing Him To Pieces

‘We’re Just Mad And Want To Destroy Something,’ Say Candidate’s Backers

WASHINGTON—Saying they simply needed something to direct their anger toward, the nation’s frenzied Donald Trump supporters admitted Thursday that, if circumstances were different, they would be just as happy tearing the Republican frontrunner to pieces.
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Samsung Unveils Smartwatch

Samsung debuted its much-anticipated Galaxy Gear smartwatch yesterday, which allows the wearer to make calls or read texts and emails from their wrist and use any of 70 apps, though the device has to be synced with a nearby Galaxy Note tablet to operate. What do you think?

  • “Finally, I can call from my wrist instead of my hand.”

    Ariel Bryant
    Unemployed
  • “That’s cool. It’s like a cell phone, but smaller, wearable, and it needs another cell phone to work.”

    Dirk Redd
    Snake Catcher
  • “Great, a new place for phantom vibrations on my body.”

    David Rosenthal
    Broadcaster