Samsung Unveils Smartwatch

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Vol 49 Issue 36

Onion Sports’ NFL Week One Picks

OSN shares its expert analysis on the teams that will come away with victory in this weekend’s NFL Week One games: Ravens at Broncos OSN’s Lock Of The Week: Broncos — The Broncos will win this game in a 49-27 rout o...

Nicole Walden

A memorial service will be held Friday for Nicole Walden, the world’s first “Nikki,” who passed away peacefully yesterday at 92.
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TV Listings
Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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Small Business

Good Times

Man Considers Nodding Approvingly After Friend’s Drink Purchase

MEQUON, WI—Seeking to convey his endorsement of his acquaintance's selection at local bar Coney's Draft House this evening, area man Thomas Dodge told reporters that he was considering nodding approvingly at his friend’s alcoholic beverage pur...

Samsung Unveils Smartwatch

Samsung debuted its much-anticipated Galaxy Gear smartwatch yesterday, which allows the wearer to make calls or read texts and emails from their wrist and use any of 70 apps, though the device has to be synced with a nearby Galaxy Note tablet to operate. What do you think?

  • “Finally, I can call from my wrist instead of my hand.”

    Ariel Bryant
    Unemployed
  • “That’s cool. It’s like a cell phone, but smaller, wearable, and it needs another cell phone to work.”

    Dirk Redd
    Snake Catcher
  • “Great, a new place for phantom vibrations on my body.”

    David Rosenthal
    Broadcaster
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