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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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SC Voters Forgive Sanford For ‘Appalachian Trail’ Affair

Four years after famously lying to his staff and constituents that he was hiking the Appalachian Trail, when in actuality he was visiting his secret Argentine lover, former South Carolina governor Mark Sanford won a special congressional election yesterday. What do you think?

  • “It’s a sad day for our country when elections are no longer decided by how many affairs each candidate has had.”

    Steph Brackhagen Toe And Heel Laster
  • “Well, if we can count on South Carolina voters for one thing, it’s making the right decision.”

    Jean-Pierre Fontaine Systems Analyst
  • “Did he ever get a chance to check out that trail? I hear it’s beautiful.”

    Kenneth Roger Tow Truck Driver
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