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Schwarzenegger Victorious

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Trump Casually Informs Pence He Going To Make One Or Two Appearances During Speech

CLEVELAND—Pulling his running mate aside backstage at the Republican National Convention just minutes before the Indiana governor was scheduled to formally accept the party’s vice presidential nomination, GOP candidate Donald Trump casually informed Mike Pence that he would probably make one or two quick appearances during the Midwestern conservative’s headlining speech tonight.

‘Heed My Tragic Story Well, Friends, For You Could Just As Easily Be Me,’ Says Chris Christie In Haunting RNC Speech

CLEVELAND—A thrall sweeping over the assembled GOP officials and party members Tuesday as he recounted his chilling tale of hubris, New Jersey governor Chris Christie reportedly entreated those at the Republican National Convention to consider the sad story of his own dizzying rise and ignominious fall, offering a bitter warning to all in attendance that his terrible fate could befall any one of them.
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Schwarzenegger Victorious

After the recall of Gov. Gray Davis, Arnold Schwarzenegger was elected governor of California. What do you think?
  • "I voted for Arnold because I agreed with his economic plan. And because I was afraid he might punch me in the face if I didn't."

    Daniel Powell Sound Engineer
  • "At last, a political family that combines the remnants of the Camelot dynasty with the origins of the Predator franchise."

    Molly Prather Executive Secretary
  • "It certainly is an interesting career path, to go from bodybuilder to movie star to politician to man in way over his head."

    Will Becton Anesthesiologist
  • "I'm from Minnesota, and I demand some credit. We elected a ridiculous joke of a governor years ago."

    Brandon Calhoun Systems Analyst
  • "Who would have thought that a bad Austrian artist who's obsessed with the human physical ideal could assemble such a rabid political following?"

    Sarah Jacobs Lyricist
  • "Don't blame me—I voted for the porn star."

    Kevin Napier Radio Operator

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