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What To Watch For In The New Obi-Wan Kenobi Film

Disney has announced they are in the early stages of developing a stand-alone ‘Star Wars’ film focused on the adventures of Jedi master Obi-Wan Kenobi. Here’s what fans can expect to see in the upcoming release.

Man In Center Of Political Spectrum Under Impression He Less Obnoxious

MT. VERNON, OH—Loudly explaining to anyone within earshot that both the left and right were ruining the level of discourse in this country, Jesse Levin, a man firmly in the center of the political spectrum, is under the impression that he is less obnoxious than those with more partisan viewpoints, sources reported Friday.
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Scientist Names Ancient Lizard After Obama

In honor of President Barack Obama, a Yale University scientist has bestowed the name Obamadon gracilis on a species of ancient lizard that was less than a foot in length and went extinct around the same time as the dinosaurs. What do you think?

  • “To think it was only a couple months ago that we were all wondering, ‘Who will win this election so that we can finally name that lizard?’”

    Gabriela Scadato Toxicologist
  • “And still not so much as an iguana named after Chuck Schumer. Disgraceful.”

    Sully Jaggars Lettuce Trimmer
  • “Yeah, I thought about naming my cat Obama, but he just looked more like a ‘Puff,’ you know?”

    Charlie Panagos Lace Weaver

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