Recent News

The Pros And Cons Of Gene Editing

Recent advancements in gene editing have introduced a number of exciting possibilities for human advancement and raised difficult ethical questions. The Onion breaks down the pros and cons of gene editing.

Tips For Back-To-School Shopping

As kids prepare to go back to school, parents are tasked with providing all the supplies and clothes they’ll need for the year. Here are The Onion’s tips for tackling back-to-school shopping.

Report: Sky Normal Today

WASHINGTON—Informing citizens there really wasn’t anything special going on up there, the nation’s scientists confirmed the sky is normal today.
End Of Section
  • More News

Scientist: Yetis Real, Related To Polar Bears

According to a geneticist, DNA collected from two pelts, which Himalayan residents believe to be those of yetis, matched DNA from a species of ancient polar bear, with the scientist positing that yetis exist and are likely a hybrid form of polar bear and brown bear. What do you think?

  • “That’s what I’ve been trying to convince everyone for years: that I once saw a slightly different type of bear than usual.”

    Andres Elfstrand Textile Restorer
  • “Wait until they tell us the Loch Ness monster is also just a polar bear.”

    Alisa Cohagan Demolition Specialist
  • “Listen, I have a lot to say about yetis and I’d love to talk about this, but I need to catch this bus.”

    Emilio Humber Lens Grinder

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.