adBlockCheck

Seinfeld To Revive Microsoft

Top Headlines

Entertainment

Hollywood Stars Overthrown In Bloody C-List Uprising

LOS ANGELES—Unleashing a brutal wave of violence and destruction that has upended the entire power structure of the entertainment industry overnight, the nation’s C-list celebrities have carried out a bloody coup to overthrow the hottest stars in Hollywood, sources reported Tuesday.

Lost Jack London Manuscript, ‘The Doggy,’ Found

RYE, NY—Workers inventorying the estate of a recently deceased Westchester County art dealer earlier this month reportedly stumbled upon a draft of a previously unknown Jack London novel titled The Doggy, and the work is already being hailed by many within the literary world as a masterpiece.
End Of Section
  • More News
Up Next

Seinfeld To Revive Microsoft

In order to revitalize its brand image, Microsoft has hired former sitcom actor Jerry Seinfeld as a spokesman. What do you think?
  • "Microsoft…Jerry Seinfeld...I remember those."

    Ray Dorsey Sleep Clinician
  • "I hope he does the bit about high-bandwidth digital content protection."

    Anita Conniff Building Inspector
  • "I can't even imagine why they stuck with John Hodgman for so long. What a poor advocate for PCs."

    Ben Jankowsky Traffic Cop

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

X Close