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How Amazon Plans To Expand

After years of rapid growth and expansion into new industries, Amazon recently announced that it would be opening a second headquarters outside of Seattle. Here are Amazon’s plans for continued growth.

Report: Americans Now Get 44% Of Their Exercise From Licking

WASHINGTON—Saying the practice accounted for a sizable portion of the nation’s physical activity on any given day, a new report published Tuesday by researchers at the National Institutes of Health revealed that Americans currently get 44 percent of their exercise from licking things.

‘Lost Dog’ Poster Really Tooting Dog’s Horn

BROOKLYN, NY—Claiming the flyer could really stand to tone it down a little, sources said a lost dog poster that began appearing in Brooklyn’s Fort Greene neighborhood Tuesday was really tooting the dog’s horn.
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Serena Williams Pregnant

After posing a Snapchat announcement and then quickly deleting it, tennis star Serena Williams has confirmed she is pregnant. What do you think?

  • “I hate when I’m forced to think of an athlete as anything more than an optimally functional sports-playing machine.”

    Vinnie Ross Lobster Prepper
  • “Next time my wife whines about a difficult pregnancy, I’ll tell her to win a Grand Slam in the first trimester.”

    Aleks Stavros Retired Muse
  • “I can’t wait to see what Serena’s children will be forced to excel at!”

    Tori Bava Bean Sheller

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