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Shirley Temple Dies At 85

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Entire Broncos Organization Announces Retirement After Super Bowl Win

‘There’s Nothing Better Than Going Out On Top,’ Says Every Denver Player, Coach, Executive, Trainer, Office Administrator, Janitor

SANTA CLARA, CA—Following the team’s 24-10 victory over the Carolina Panthers in Super Bowl 50, every single member of the Denver Broncos organization officially announced their retirement Sunday.

Family, Friends Concerned After Peyton Manning Wanders Away From Pocket

SANTA CLARA, CA—Admitting to being “worried sick” after realizing he had suddenly disappeared in the middle of a play, family and friends of Peyton Manning grew incredibly concerned Sunday after the veteran Denver Broncos quarterback wandered away from the pocket during the first quarter of Super Bowl 50, sources confirmed.
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Shirley Temple Dies At 85

Shirley Temple Black, one of the most famous child stars in Hollywood history who was featured in dozens of Depression-era films and later built a political career as a delegate to the United Nations and ambassador to Ghana, died yesterday at age 85. What do you think?

  • “Let me get this straight: Shirley Temple Black—the former ambassador to Ghana—used to be a child star?”

    Brian Walker
    Water Cooler Installer
  • “She’ll live on as the perfect role model for all us stage moms prematurely pushing our daughters into show business.”

    Cynthia Roberts
    Unemployed
  • “Shirley Temple Black? I didn’t know she got married. Good for her!”

    Declan Butler
    Assistant Professor

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