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‘The Princess Bride’ By The Numbers

‘The Princess Bride’ was released 30 years ago today, and it has since become a classic beloved by people of all ages. ‘The Onion’ looks back at ‘The Princess Bride’ 30 years later.

National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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Showtime Sued Over Poor Quality Stream Of Mayweather-McGregor Fight

Customers have filed a class-action suit against Showtime over its pay-per-view stream of Saturday’s fight between Floyd Mayweather and Conor McGregor, which reportedly suffered from low video quality and excessive buffering. What do you think?

  • “So the fighters didn’t suddenly stop in the middle of the second round and stare at each other motionlessly for 15 minutes?”

    Matt Cylkowski Bovine Epidimiologist
  • “Serves them right for shelling out $99.99 when you can watch people fight on the internet for free.”

    Rachel Keeley Herbal Gardener
  • “My bookie is giving me three-to-one that this settles out of court.”

    Andrew Chamberlain Bandolier Salesman

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