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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Shriver, Schwarzenegger Separate

After 25 years of marriage, former California governor Arnold Schwarzenegger and former NBC News reporter Maria Shriver announced they are separating. What do you think?

  • “So they’ll both pay each other alimony?”

    Kal Li Racket Stringer
  • "Look, no flame burns eternal. Even the groping muscleman flame can fade."

    Zeke Totman Banking Pin Adjuster
  • "Arnold and Maria have asked for compassion and respect from the media and public during this difficult time, and I intend to comply with that request. Sorry."

    Mary Kate Pruzhanov Sales Manager
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