Solar Plane Makes First Intercontinental Flight

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‘SportsCenter’ Co-Anchors Clearly Dating

BRISTOL, CT—Saying that the pair could barely take their eyes off one another throughout the hour-long sports news program, ESPN viewers told reporters Friday that it is increasingly clear SportsCenter anchors John Anderson and Matt Barrie are currently dating.

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TACOMA, WA—Bursting into the establishment seemingly out of nowhere and overtaking it within a matter of moments, a terrifying uniformed bachelorette party stormed local pub Casey’s Saloon Friday night, onlookers reported.
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Solar Plane Makes First Intercontinental Flight

Pilots flew the Solar Impulse, an experimental solar-powered two-person aircraft, on a two-leg journey from Switzerland to Morocco. What do you think?

  • “That seems pretty risky. What if Ra becomes displeased and blots out the sun?”

    Kelly Knight
    Systems Analyst
  • “Sure, it may be efficient to fly, but it'll take a lot of the available power for the speakers to make a satisfying roaring sound.”

    Abigail Humphreys
    Char Puller
  • “Harnessing energy from the sun is so short-sighted. It’s just going to blow up in a few trillion years anyway.”

    James Dale
    Scroll Assembler
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