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Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

Voter Fraud: Myth Vs. Fact

Concerns over fraudulent voting have grown since the 2016 election, with President Trump himself claiming that millions of people voted illegally. The Onion debunks some common myths about voter fraud.
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Some Organics Not Green

As they ramp up production to meet the demands of a growing market, some organic farms are coming under scrutiny for agricultural practices that may do more harm to the land than good. What do you think?

  • "This is precisely why I've stuck all these years to synthetic carrots."

    Rick Beals Systems Analyst
  • "I've been skeptical of the 'organic' label for a long time. How can one know for certain whether Whole Foods organic sandwich cookies are grown on pesticide-free land and rotated with other organic crops, such as ice-cream waffle cones?"

    Anne Kremer Back Padder
  • "I beg to differ. If you'll notice, right below the word 'organic' there's often a cartoon of a very pleasant valley with a smiling sun and a bunny. See?"

    Matthew Marlin Unemployed

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Breaking: ACLU Hard As A Fucking Rock Right Now

NEW YORK—In response to President Trump’s declaration that transgendered Americans would no longer be permitted to serve in the military, the ACLU announced Wednesday that it was hard as a fucking rock right now.

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