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South Carolina Senate Candidate Refuses To Drop Out

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Cannon Overshoots Tim Kaine Across Wells Fargo Center

PHILADELPHIA—Noting that the vice presidential nominee had been launched nearly 100 feet into the air during his entrance into the Democratic National Convention Wednesday night, sources reported that the cannon at the back of the Wells Fargo Center had accidentally overshot Tim Kaine across the arena, sending him crashing to the stage several dozen feet beyond the erected safety net.

Who Is Tim Kaine?

Virginia senator Tim Kaine will be Hillary Clinton’s running mate on the Democratic Party ticket in the 2016 presidential election. Here’s what you need to know about Kaine

Lone Superdelegate Voting For Martin O’Malley Feels Like Total Fucking Idiot

PHILADELPHIA—Sheepishly raising his hand to nominate the man who suspended his presidential campaign back in February, unpledged delegate Bob Shiefke told reporters Tuesday he felt like a “total fucking idiot” for being the only person at the Democratic National Convention voting for former Maryland governor Martin O’Malley.

Michelle Obama: ‘Well, There Are 8 Years Of My Life I’ll Never Get Back’

PHILADELPHIA—Her face fixed in an expression of apathetic detachment as she took the stage Monday night to raucous cheers and applause, First Lady Michelle Obama reportedly began her address to the Democratic National Convention by exhaling audibly and remarking that she would never get the past eight years of her life back.
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South Carolina Senate Candidate Refuses To Drop Out

Democratic candidate Alvin Greene is refusing to drop out of the South Carolina’s U.S. Senate race despite having been charged with a felony for showing a college student pornographic materials. What do you think?

  • "This Alvin Greene thing is weird. Since when does South Carolina have Democrats?"

    Horace Mendez Wheel Cutter
  • "Say what you will about the man's competence as a politician. He sure knows what the ladies like."

    Tara Axenrot Unemployed
  • "I don't care what he does, I'm voting for the guy named Al Green."

    Paul Wiberg Tack Puller

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