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Politics

Robert Mueller Driving SUV 100 MPH Down Runway As Air Force One Narrowly Lifts Off

PRINCE GEORGE’S COUNTY, MD—Sending a pair of guards scrambling for safety as he gunned his black SUV through a chain-link gate and onto the tarmac, Robert Mueller, the former FBI director who was recently tapped to lead the ongoing investigation into the Trump campaign’s ties to Russia, chased Air Force One down the runway at Joint Base Andrews moments before takeoff, sources reported Tuesday.

Trump Asks Entire Senate To Clear Out Of Chamber So He Can Speak To Comey Alone

WASHINGTON—Entering through a side door and bidding the assembled legislators, congressional aides, and members of the media to give him a moment with the former FBI director, President Donald Trump reportedly asked the entire Senate to clear the chamber during James Comey’s testimony Thursday so he could speak to him alone.

A Timeline Of The Watergate Scandal

With the White House mired in controversy, comparisons to Washington’s most famous scandal have been common, if not always accurate. Forty-five years after the events leading to Nixon’s resignation, The Onion presents a detailed timeline of the Watergate scandal.
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Spitzer Not Charged

Disgraced former New York governor Eliot Spitzer will not be charged for his role in a recent prostitution scandal that brought down his administration. What do you think?
  • "I'm worried this sends a message that anyone could do what he did and get away with just a few weeks of mass-media vilification and the total collapse of one's career."

    Dick Mancowicz Miner
  • "What? Those lame district attorneys. If Eliot Spitzer had been prosecuting himself he'd have thrown his ass in jail months ago."

    Emily Westley Spanish Teacher
  • "I'm sure he'll make it up to all of New York's citizens somehow. Perhaps by having sex with them."

    Phil Sabin Systems Analyst

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