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National Zoo Announces Giant Pandas To Divorce

WASHINGTON—Assuring the public that the decision was difficult but the right thing to do for all parties involved, the Smithsonian National Zoological Park announced Friday that their giant pandas would be divorcing.

New Climate Change Report Just List Of Years Each Country Becomes Uninhabitable

GENEVA—Stating that the data published within its pages represented the scientific consensus of top researchers around the world, the U.N. Intergovernmental Panel on Climate Change released its annual report this week, which consists solely of an alphabetized list of every country on earth and the years each of them will become uninhabitable.

Pros And Cons Of Electric Cars

With technology improving and more automobile companies releasing electric models, electric cars are becoming a common alternative for American consumers. Here are the pros and cons of electric vehicles.
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Spy Satellite Going To Crash

An American spy satellite launched in 2006 has lost power and expected to fall to Earth in late February or early March. What do you think?
  • "Get your cameras out. If my calculations are correct, the impact will be at least a 7.4 on the Bruckheimer scale."

    Al Barber Systems Analyst
  • "Just like the government, always trying to find a way to get their spy satellites in our business."

    Rachel Mays Department Store Manager
  • "I never knew there would be consequences to mankind's insatiable thirst for knowledge."

    Sean Monnahagn Security Guard

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