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Listen, Area Boss Gets It

PHILADELPHIA—Readily admitting that everything you’re saying makes a lot of sense, Greenwave Media accounts manager Bryan Mellis confirmed on Wednesday that he totally gets it.

Man Hoping Game Gets Out Of Hand So He Can Do Something Else

DENVER—Settling into his apartment’s cramped living room to watch the midday game, local man Garrett Neubauer told reporters Wednesday that he hoped the televised baseball game between the Colorado Rockies and the San Francisco Giants would get out of hand soon so he could do something else.
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St. Louis Rated Most Dangerous City

A study of crime statistics showed that, with 2,070.1 violent crimes per 100,000 residents, St. Louis was the most violent city in the United States in 2009. What do you think?

  • "Well, it is such a depressing, pessimistic city, what with that gigantic frown monument they have there."

    Jenn Ashley Assembler
  • "I believe it. I kill people in St. Louis all the time."

    Jeff Ouimet Systems Analyst
  • "Are you serious? But I was just there last summer, and it was fine! The zoo smelled a little too much, and the river was muddy, and my friend was shot, but everyone I met was very nice!"

    Jerry Puleo Compliance Officer

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