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Islam: Myth Vs. Fact

In the wake of President Trump’s proposed immigration ban targeting largely Muslim countries, The Onion separates myth from fact regarding the religion of Islam.

Players To Watch In The Sweet 16

The 2017 NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament has provided thrilling upsets and amazing comebacks in the first two rounds. Onion Sports presents a guide to the 10 players to watch in the Sweet 16.

Archaeologists Uncover Last Human To Die Happy

DEMBECHA, ETHIOPIA—In a startling find that contributes significantly to the understanding of modern man’s evolutionary development, University of Edinburgh archaeologists working in Ethiopia’s Afar Region announced Wednesday that they have uncovered the preserved remains of the last human to die happy.
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Starbucks Opens First Teahouse, Plans 1,000 More

Starbucks opened a teahouse in Manhattan that serves a variety of teas and food items, the first of what it hopes will be 1,000 such stores across the United States. What do you think?

  • “Where do they get all this money?”

    Reinhart Brinkmann Braille Transcriber
  • “I’m doubtful, but I hope this works out for them. Love those Starbucks guys.”

    Melinda Newquist Filter Cleaner
  • “I can’t wait to refuse to eat there because it’s so corporate.”

    Kenny Knipp Unemployed
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