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‘Star Wars’ Turns 40

When George Lucas’ Star Wars premiered in 1977, the movie quickly became a phenomenon. On its 40th anniversary, The Onion looks back on the franchise’s defining moments:

Ringo Starr Announces 26th Beatles Album With New Backing Band

‘Moonbeam Sunday’ Slated For Release On June 16

LONDON—Excitedly informing fans that the iconic pop group was back with more original music, Ringo Starr announced Tuesday that on June 16 he would be releasing a 26th Beatles album titled ‘Moonbeam Sunday’ with an all-new backing band.
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State Of The Union Could Coincide With 'Lost' Premiere

Fans of the show Lost were up in arms when it was announced that President Obama's State of the Union address might preempt the show's season premiere. What do you think?
  • "Hopefully, the speech will be just as suspenseful and tantalizingly inconclusive."

    Chance Stefanovich Bar Manager
  • "I don't give a shit. I stopped watching Lost after the second season and quit paying attention to the State of the Union address during Reagan's second term."

    Pauline Shallcross Greeter
  • "That's cool with me. I'll still invite everyone over, but instead of drinking each time Des says 'brotha' or the smoke monster appears, we'll drink each time Obama says 'responsibility' or they cut to Lieberman."

    Chuck Trice Systems Analyst

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