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The Onion’s 2017 Oscar Picks

The 89th Academy Awards features a more diverse slate of film and actor nominees than in past years, though the ceremony could still field #OscarsSoWhite criticism. Here are The Onion’s picks for who should take home the coveted Oscar statuettes:

A Timeline Of The EPA

A recently introduced House bill that would dissolve the Environmental Protection Agency questions the value of what this agency does and what its goals are. The Onion provides a timeline of the EPA’s 47-year history:
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Steven Tyler Leaving 'American Idol'

After two years serving as a judge, 64-year-old Aerosmith frontman Steven Tyler announced he is leaving the long-running Fox reality singing competition American Idol. What do you think?

  • “I don’t know if the contest is going to mean anything without Steven Tyler’s legitimizing stamp of approval.”

    Em Morwood Youth Camp Counselor
  • “I’m sort of glad. It’s been weird going to Aerosmith shows and having to stare at that empty microphone stand with all the strands of cloth hanging from it for three hours while the rest of the band plays.”

    Eugene Clifton Unemployed
  • “Well, that’s just great. Now what am I supposed to do with all these illegally branded American Idol wax lips?”

    Nicholas Dolci Shop Owner
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