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‘Lost Dog’ Poster Really Tooting Dog’s Horn

BROOKLYN, NY—Claiming the flyer could really stand to tone it down a little, sources said a lost dog poster that began appearing in Brooklyn’s Fort Greene neighborhood Tuesday was really tooting the dog’s horn.

FDA Rents Party House Upstate To Test New Drug

TOBYHANNA, PA—With preclinical studies of an in-development cholesterol-reducing medication now complete, Food and Drug Administration officials confirmed Monday they would be conducting initial trials of the new drug at a large party house they had rented in upstate Pennsylvania.

Refs Let 49ers Put As Many Men On Field As They Want

SEATTLE—Sighing into the microphone as he stood at the 50-yard line of Centurylink Field, NFL referee Gene Steratore ruled during Sunday’s game that the San Francisco 49ers could put as many men on the field as they want.
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Store-Bought Honey May Be Dangerous

More than three quarters of the honey on American store shelves may have been smuggled in from China and could be tainted with heavy metals and antibiotics, according to a Food Safety News investigation. What do you think?

  • "That's why I only eat honey I've harvested myself, and that's also why I've never eaten any honey."

    Heather Farquhar Assistant Buyer
  • "What about Fluff? Please say there's no tainted Fluff on my American grocery shelves."

    Pat Cunnington Systems Analyst
  • "This is bad and all, but I'd sure like to meet a Chinese honey smuggler."

    Lance Jamrozy Monument Setter

More from this section

FDA Rents Party House Upstate To Test New Drug

TOBYHANNA, PA—With preclinical studies of an in-development cholesterol-reducing medication now complete, Food and Drug Administration officials confirmed Monday they would be conducting initial trials of the new drug at a large party house they had rented in upstate Pennsylvania.

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