Strategic Oil Reserves

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Area Dad Thinks Refs Should Just Let Them Play Football

DOYLESTOWN, PA—Facetiously questioning how the game had suddenly become a non-contact sport, local father Aaron Harper confirmed his belief Thursday that referees officiating a Thanksgiving game between the Philadelphia Eagles and Detroit Lions should just let them play football out there.
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Just Like Everything Else!: Fox 8 p.m. EDT/7 p.m. ABC Pete's wife is still on him about building that darn shed, these kids are going to be the death of Sheila and Dave, and the hot next-door neighbor is up in EVERYBODY'S business! Sunday nights on ABC couldn't be any more familiar!

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  • Father Apologizes For Taking Out Anger On Wrong Son

    ELIZABETH, NJ—Moments after losing his composure with an unwarranted emotional outburst, local father David Kessler reportedly apologized to his son Christopher Thursday for erroneously taking out his anger on him and not his older brother Peter.

Strategic Oil Reserves

In the wake of Hurricane Katrina, President Bush is tapping the strategic oil reserve to help petroleum refiners. What do you think?
  • "It's a compassionate gesture in a time of natural disaster, but I’m warning you: One of these days, Bush's big heart is going to get him in trouble."

    Morton Karnes
  • "I'm against it. The Strategic Petroleum Reserve was created way back in 1973, during that passing fad of 'forward thinking.'"

    Alison Dumont
  • "The oil industry can't rely on soaring prices and record profits to weather this meteorological inconvenience. They need a hand up."

    Brian Arsenault
    Claims Adjuster