adBlockCheck

Recent News

Most Anticipated Panels At Comic-Con

San Diego Comic-Con kicks off tomorrow, and this year’s schedule is packed with must-see events. Here are the most highly-anticipated panels of Comic-Con 2017.

Listen, Area Boss Gets It

PHILADELPHIA—Readily admitting that everything you’re saying makes a lot of sense, Greenwave Media accounts manager Bryan Mellis confirmed on Wednesday that he totally gets it.
End Of Section
  • More News

Stressed-Out Men Prefer Heavier Women

A new British study found that men placed in stressful situations tended to rate photographs of females with higher body mass indexes as more attractive than did stress-free men who were shown the same images. What do you think?

  • “That’s accurate. After a long day at work, I’ll masturbate to just about anything.”

    Arnie Goldblat Padding Gluer
  • “And everyone knows that women of all sizes prefer stressed-out, basket-case men, so it all works out.”

    Jill Tenvik Judge
  • “Wow. I had no idea how stressed my brother was.”

    Bruce Byrd Nut Roaster

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close