adBlockCheck

Recent News

A Timeline Of Abraham Lincoln’s Life

Every February, people across the the nation celebrate the legacy of Abraham Lincoln, widely considered to be one of America’s finest presidents. The Onion provides a timeline of the key moments in President Lincoln’s life:

Most Valuable Sports Memorabilia

Sports collectibles have skyrocketed in popularity over the past several decades, with sales of such items as game-worn jerseys and autographed rookie cards generating billions of dollars each year. Onion Sports examines the most sought-after and highly valued sports memorabilia in the world.

Nation Leery Of Very Odd Little Boy

WASHINGTON—Noting that there was something distinctly unnerving about his mannerisms, physical appearance, and overall demeanor, the nation confirmed Friday that it was leery of very odd 8-year-old Brendan Nault.

What You Need To Know About The Trump Administration’s Ties To Russia

New revelations from the U.S. intelligence community about potentially illegal communications between members of the Trump administration and Russian officials, which led to Michael Flynn resigning as national security advisor Monday, have increased calls for a wider investigation of Trump’s murky ties to Russia. Here’s what you need to know.
End Of Section
  • More News

Study: Bullies Derive Health Benefits From Behavior

According to a new study, adolescents who bullied others showed lower levels of inflammation, leaving them at lower risk of heart disease and other chronic conditions, while their victims showed much higher inflammation levels. What do you think?

  • “Yeah, but if I stood up for myself then I’d be dead already.”

    Doug Corman Internet Security Expert
  • “The trick is to bully someone just enough that you reap the health benefits but not so much that they come to school and kill you.”

    Beth Granger Duplex Realtor
  • “At least I took all those punches for someone.”

    Mike Haffeman Genealogist
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close