adBlockCheck

Recent News

Earth Ranked Number One Party Planet

FRAMINGHAM, MA—Noting its high concentration of nightlife, droves of attractive singles, and atmospheric conditions allowing liquid alcohol to exist, the ‘Princeton Review’ on Monday ranked Earth the Milky Way galaxy’s top party planet for the fifth year in a row.
End Of Section
  • More News

Study: Liberals Drink More Than Conservatives

A study published in the Journal of Wine Economics, which analyzed data from all 50 states for a period of 50 years, found that blue states drank more liquor and beer than states that leaned right. What do you think?

  • “I wonder if it helps them live with what they did at Benghazi.”

    Tony Pettini Youth Sports Organizer
  • “Oh, that’s just because liberals are sadder, happier, more social, less social, or bored.”

    Milena Whitakker Gallery Owner
  • “So sue us if we’re still celebrating the reelection of G. K. Butterfield of North Carolina’s first congressional district.”

    Gary Call College Bursar
More Videos

WATCH VIDEO FROM THE ONION

More from this section

Sign up For The Onion's Newsletter

Give your spam filter something to do.

Close